Trains

So this morning was probably one of the most interesting train rides I've had since I've been here in New York.  I get to my stop about 10 minutes earlier than normal because I'm wanting to get to work early.  The train is of course running behind and so I know then at this point that when it comes it's gonna be packed full of people.  Of course as it pulls up I look in and people are barely able to move.  I'm determined to get in and I do. I move to as close to the center as possible and I grab on to the rail.  As the train starts to take off I notice someone sitting on the floor of the train right next to me...legs spread out.  Usually I only see this if it's a homeless person or in general someone a few fries short of a happy meal.  Of course I notice the lady sitting there.  I saw her get kicked off an evening train once when I was heading to midtown from my apartment. I remembered her cursing at nothing and just acting violent, and the conductor kicking her off.  It was the first time I saw that.  Well...within a few short minutes of me standing next to her--being surrounded by people--I hear her screaming again.  She's screaming things like..."FUCK YOU YOU BITCH GET OUT OF MY SEAT...I WANT A SEAT..."  Ok...this is ridiculous.  I wish someone would have just given her a seat--but obviously no one was willing to do this.  What's worse is I hear a loud noise through my ipod music. It sounds like a door slamming when at the same time I feel my hand vibrate....I turn...here she is violently banging the back of her head on the pole. Not in a playful way...but in a way that says "I WANT MY BRAINS TO SEEP OUT OF MY EARS" banging.  She wasn't stopping.  I was quite disturbed by this.  I mean besides the fact that this woman is obviously mentally ill in some way...I really didn't want to witness someone bashing their head so hard that blood would start coming out of her ears.  The lady standing closest to her kept looking at me in horror....as well as others. But it disturbed me that NO ONE was saying anything.  I was FREAKED out and getting pissed.  The last stop before Manhattan brought much confusion to the train as the usual people at Queensboro tried to cram even further into an already crammed train.  She freaked out even more.  Her cursing got worse and more profane--she was yelling directly at these two women sitting in front of her.  Perhaps these people have seen her many times before and just expect this behavior...perhaps everyone was just able to tune it out better than me...perhaps people took sympathy on her....who knows....but something snapped within me. I couldn't hear her head banging against the pole ONE more time...and I especially couldn't hear or see her yelling at other passengers.  I leaned down and in an adrenaline filled moment I looked at her and I said..."HEY! HEY SHUT UP! SHUT THE FUCK UP!  YOU HAVE A GODDAMN SEAT ON THE FLOOR NOW SHUT UP, STOP YELLING, AND PLEASE STOP BANGING YOUR HEAD!"  The train became silent. I could barely believe what I just said--she looked at me and simply said..."FUCK YOU!" And I looked right back at her and I said..."NO-FUCK YOU! NOW SHUT THE HELL UP!"  She stopped.  She certainly didn't utter another word until we got to 59th and Lexington.  As soon as the doors opened she went at it again yelling at people.  I decided to go to the conductor of the train and make it known that someone was harrassing the other riders.  As I approach there is a line of about 10 people telling the conductor the same thing. The conductor gets out and goes into the car.  That's all I know...as I had to get to work and catch my transfer.  

I don't feel bad about yelling.  I really don't.  I realize that she may be mentally ill or mentally handicapped in some way.  But regardless...that gives no one reason to cause a disturbance on the train. And it especially gives no one reason for banging their head and for yelling throughout and entire train ride harassing the other passengers.  These days you just don't know who is riding the train, who is walking beside you, etc.  I was not about to give this women the power. Someone needed to let her know that she was in the wrong and WHO had the power.  

So that's my interesting story of the day.  Now...the thankful list:

I'm thankful today that:

1) I made it to work on time/early

2) Today is pay day

3) I have money in my account

4) I had time to stop at starbucks this morning

5) Waking up again to warm kisses

6) I'm going away this weekend with my love. 

7) I'm seeing my two best friends this weekend.

8) I can sing.

9) That I have a good job.

10) that I have prospects

11) That I don't bang my head on the subway posts.