7 deadly sins

Seven Deadly Sins Survey

Wrath

Who did you last get angry with?
Ehhh the retard who turned when people were crossing the street.

What is your weapon of choice?
A gun

Would you hit a member of the opposite sex?
Ummm maybe

How about the same sex?
yeah

Who was the last person who got really angry at you?
Hard to tell.

What is your pet peeve?
People who are full of themselves

Do you keep grudges, or can you let them go easily?
I usually can let go pretty easily.

Sloth

What is one thing you're suppose to do daily that you haven't?
wake up on time

What is the latest you've ever woken up?
4 p.m. maybe

Name a person you've been meaning to contact, but haven't?
Maggie

What is the last lame excuse that you made?
I'm tired.

Have you ever watched an infomercial all the way through?
sadly yes

How many times did you hit the snooze button on your alarm clock this morning?
7--it's terrible, I know.

Gluttony

What is your overpriced yuppie beverage of choice?
fruit infused martini

Are you a meat eater?
Yes

What is the greatest amount of alcohol you've had in one sitting/outing/event?
4 Stellas, 2 shots, and 1 mixer in about 40 minutes.

Are you comfortable with your drinking and eating habits?
yes

Do you enjoy candy and sweets?
Unfortunately, yes

Which do you prefer: sweets, salty foods or spicy foods?
all three! :)

Have you ever looked at a small house pet or child and thought, "lunch"?
what no


Greed

How many credit cards do you own?
2 too many

If you had a million dollars, what would you do with it?
be debt free...take a year to just study and audition...save and invest the rest and pretend I didn't have it.

Would you rather be rich or famous?
a little of both

Would you accept a boring job if it meant that you would make megabucks?
Ummm boring is not my style.


Pride

What's one thing that you have done that you're most proud of?
Got my masters degree and moved to NYC and performed within the first two months of being here.

What's one thing you have done that your parents are most proud of?
gone through two degrees.

What thing would you like to accomplish late in your life?
renovate a big house with my husband.

Do you get annoyed by coming in second place?
not really.

Have you ever entered a contest of skill, knowing you were of much higher skill than all the other competitors?
no

Have you ever cheated to get a better score?
yes

What did you do today that you're proud of?
got to work 10 minutes early...enough time to check myself in the mirror, grab a bagel and coffee, and breathe.


Lust

How many people have you seen naked (not counting movies, family, strippers, locker rooms)?
ohhh too many to name.

How many people have seen you naked (not counting physicians, doctors, family, locker rooms, or when you were a young child)?
isn't this the same question?

Have you ever caught yourself staring at the chest/crotch of a person of your chosen sex during a normal conversation?
yes

What is your favorite body part of a person of your gender choice?
Lips

Have you ever had sexual encounters (including kissing/making out) with multiple persons?
yes

Have you ever been propositioned by a prostitute?
no


Envy

What item of your friends would you most want to have for your own?
my own house in Massachusettes

Who would you want to go on "Trading Spaces" with?
Anne

If you could be anyone who existed in the world, who would you be?
Jude Law

Have you ever been cheated on?
Yes

Have you ever wished you had a physical feature different from your own?
yes

What inborn trait do you see in others that you wish you had for yourself?
self control

I miss you!

So since I changed my phone number everything has seemed to change with my phone in some weird way...
I call to check my voice mail and the usual lady who does the prompts has somehow changed. There's a new lady now...she's cold, stern, and not as warm as the other lady. Perhaps this is the New York voice...but when I listen to it I twitch with saddness....for what it's worth...
wherever you are...
I miss you old verizon voice mail/phone settings lady!

Allora

Allora adesso sento come la scrittura in italiano
perché... potrebbe essere divertente.
Sono curioso per vedere se nessuno risponderà
o porterà il tempo a vedere se che scrivo è italiano corretto.
Ho un ragazzo nuovo.
Sono nell'amore con lui.
Voglio mostrarlo al mondo.
Ciò è tutto per oggi.

-Justin

another hundred people just got off of the train

hit the gym tonight
the first time in too long.
i've slowly crept back into "old" routine here
which for so long seemed unbearable
the thought of going to the gym put old wicked thoughts in my head.
as i ran tonight
i looked over at karrie
i smile because the judgments werent there.
this was the life i wanted
why couldn't i have had this before?
was i not open?
too many voices, too many judges?
growth & independence.
i smiled as i hit the 15 minute mark
without stopping once-i couldn't believe it.
somehow i seemed stronger than ever
i hit the zone faster than expected.
lifting was easier than i thought.
an old face flooded my mind
realizing your toxic nature i turn
and i see another familiar face
again i smile.
i dine with karrie
margarita?
"i shouldn't--it's Tuesday & i just worked out," I said
a pause
"mango margarita please," I quickly retorted
living? yes.
a walk around gramercy and union square just talking
this can happen in real life.
connecting
my new goal.
i have finally torn the veil of that face up
my power is back in my hands
my voice is back in my hands
that face is not in the imaginary audience anymore.
i have no one to please artistically but myself.
my love is pure
reciprication is MINE right now.
I step on the train
another familiar face
random meeting people i know on the subway.
we talk and i'm reminded that i'm in the perfect place in my life.
i call the objection of my love and affection on the way back--
this is real
this is what i feel...
dreaming together-his voice makes me feel alive.
in love?
absolutely.

-Justin

An Old One

Many months old...re read it today...interesting how short in time things change:


seven years...
a long time-
probably too long I suppose.
fresh out of high school
stars in my eyes...
I sit in singers diction class
cute tall girl sitting in front of me
"who's your favorite musical theatre singer?"
"elaine paige...u?"
"Bernadette Peters"
karaoke
kamikozies...
everything seemed dream like and surreal-
I'm on my own.
shy girl meeting for the first time outside the choir room...
"you're in freshman chamber choir too?"
I can't believe we made it...
the smoking wall-batcheldor---
are you gay or bi?
friendships I will never forget.
Walking to parties....
movies in the dorm rooms....
eating at the dial...
weekends on the first floor
parties on the third.
exam weeks-never more fun than that first year.
strawberry daquiries.
term papers-
notes-
classes-
tears-
Laughter....
summer visits...sleeping together on the floor...
outdoor parties...
Sept. 11-always a vivid memory-
fear stricken
walking on slippery elm...
had sex that night
someting that seemed to relieve the pain.
Months of voice lessons...
more classes...
working in the office...
theatre shows...
Berlin to Broadway-still my all time favorite.
Hickies, parties, dances, tantrums....
21st b-day parties...
heart breaks
heart aches...
bretz.
saying goodbye to friends-
graduating....
continuing...
new life...
meeting new people...
Doc-a constant in my life here.
Europe-my constant dream forever with me...
long walks in Urbania late at night
these will forever get me through.
nights of being high...on life and on...well...
recitals
driving and listening to tons of music
spring break
six feet under & art museum.
These are all a part of me...
memories cannot be posted to their fullest
not enough room.
I'm grateful for these memories
seven very good years-
a place to call home.
Forever lingering in my heart--
writing now as I won't be able to the rest of the week-
too much raw emotion...
speak from the heart.
7 years..
I still love Bernadette Peters.
I will always look back at this chapter in my life and smile....
thank you all for your wonderful messages
your understanding blows me away.

"stop worrying where you're going...move on..."

Life doesn't end...this is never a real good-bye..
things change...
but time is constant...
connections will be forever...
we are all interwoven together in some strange but wonderful way.

Until later I send peace and love
send the same back is all I ask.

Here's to the next chapter....And to the ladies who lunch, aren't they a gas? ;-)

All my love,
Justin

Time travels

Thinking of you right now
this moment
the world
frozen still for me.
I sit and watch the people
arm in arm
they look at each other
smiling.
For once I find myself
sitting here
doing the same.
Amazed that I can feel this way
that I have the ability
the ability to love
to let go
and to go on this journey with you.
I no longer thing it's crazy
how fast things run.
Connection-
what else could I be feeling but love?
I lay down
trying to catch up
catch up on what has gladly been lost
for a week now
sleep comes to me
four days is a long way away
you move mountains within me.

My heart is yours.

-Justin

Life...

I flip on NY1 news last night immediately when I get home
I brush through my things as I prepare to go to Brooklyn for the night.
I'm curious like everyone else...Heath Ledger, dead?
It's like one of those extremely random moments you just can't believe.
I am saddened like everyone else.
A girl however was interviewed
she was smiling the entire time...
almost laughing
because she was standing in front of his SoHo apartment.
As she explained that she and her friends were visiting Perezhilton all day
calling places and just trying to figure things out
she smiled
and then made it seem like a spectacle to go to his apartment
she was thrilled beyond words to be standing in front of the hot dead actor's apartment.
This disturbed me.
Why are you smiling?
Why are you laughing?
Why are you taking advantage of this moment?
Someone just died.
A person.
A real live person.
It's not the movies.
The market is crashing...
depression around the bend?
A new revolution
exciting times?
Sometimes
interesting
while the world falls apart
changes constantly
I fall deeper in love
surrounded by good feelings
I am able to smile
and forget about the world
.....

To you...it's surreal

I'm surrounded by feelings
feelings of happiness
feelings of uncertainty that contain hope.
Every time you walk away I wish I could go with you-
crazy...my word of the week.
New ipod tunes today filled my ears on the train to 34th st.
Thoughts of you-
the train went faster.
What is this?
I have no fear all of the sudden.
I think of you all afternoon
all evening
I get off at 42nd
suddenly coming down the steps
in a crowd of hundres of people
you stood smiling.
My eyes couldn't believe it
my heart sunk for a time.
In a city full of millions of people
I run into the one my mind fixates on...we chat...
I die because I cannot control my urge to kiss you
I control it
As I walk up the stairs I turn around and look at you
I watch you smile-not noticing me staring at you.
I smile the rest of the evening.
I believe in signs-this was one.
This time has been number one for a long time...
thursday, friday, saturday...
I lay there
we speak words of honesty
I smile when I look at you
I can't help it.
Your smell is a sublime combination of cologne, liquor, weed, and my kisses.
This is totally new
completely different.
I truly have never felt like this before
Our talk of the opera
your eyes as you inquire about it
the moment my heart sunk?
when your hand slipped onto mine under the bar stool
I could have fell through the floor.
"You're not going back that far," I say...
"ok," you say.
We hop in the yellow car to an endless night of something sublime.
It flows into the day.
I stare at you on the train
your beautiful profile takes my breath away.
This has been a surprise
another apartment we are in
you have to get things
we stay, and strangely I'm comfortable.
once again staring into each others eyes
our souls recognizing each other
I can't figure it out
for now I'm happy just living the answers
this is superbly surreal
and I'm thrilled at the possibilities that abound with you.
Your kisses I'm missing for a couple of days
I will learn how to get to you
I must adjust
there's no questioning.
You walked out of the shower freshly wet
your towel wrapped around your beautiful body
I lay on the couch
you come near me and I take the towel off
and wrap my arms around your wet body
run my fingers through your wet, jet black hair
you dress and I watch you
I say you look hot
and this isn't superficial
there were just no words to explain fully.
Exhaustion sets in today
thoughts of sitting down with you
on the couch I'm about to crash on
u say it seemed natural
it did.
I'm all about you right now
wishing I could not be exhausted
quick questions of speed hit my mind
they suddenly leave
before they never left
always expecting the worst
I don't feel this-this doubt is not strong
not there.
My thoughts go to you as I fall asleep
until I see you again
I can close my eyes tonight.